How to control your anger effectively

Never make decisions or share opinions when angry.

We are sure you all have heard this or read this many times before. But not all of us can actually put this into practise. We do mess up our friendships, relationships by saying things we shouldn’t have just because we were too angry to watch our words. If you’ve found yourself in a similar soup many times, then it is necessary for you to take steps to control this self-destructive behavior.

1.
Switch off
The moment you find yourself getting too angry and on the verge of blurting out what you know you shouldn’t, we advise you to shut your brain off. Yes, completely switch off from whatever anyone is saying and start ignoring the situation that is the reason behind this uncontrollable anger. The moment you retract into your safety cocoon, and detach yourself from the happenings, you will be able to focus on the larger picture and not impulsively say things you know you shouldn’t.

2.
Breathe
Breathe from your gut. Breathe in and breathe out and totally relax your senses. Breathing is an age old, tried and tested technique that will help you to calm down. It may sound silly to you and you may wonder how one can stop being angry and start focusing on one’s breathing. Well, you can combine techniques one and two. Switch off and focus on your breathing. The purpose is to divert your attention and gain control over your anger.

3.
Think and react
Once you have taken the time out and relaxed your senses, you can ponder over the situation and get to the crux of what is troubling you. This unbiased evaluation of the situation will help you look at things/issues reasonably. A cool head will help you evaluate what is wrong and what is not and will stop you from messing things up unnecessarily because of anger.

4.
Talk calmly, apologise if you must
After you’ve analysed the situation you can continue the argument in a dignified, composed manner. Touch on points of relevance and cut the unnecessary finger-pointing and blame game out. Check your tone and voice levels and apologise if you have gone wrong somewhere.

This is an easy 4 step anger control process. Practise it whenever you get angry, and with time you will find the anger abating and gradually reducing in intensity.

By Hilonee Furia